Tag Archives: cancer

old words and falling breath…

The forage through my email gave me a little courage to pick up the diary I last closed a few before dad’s death. It was actually incredibly hard to read the last pages but it feels a little like I’ve … Continue reading

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I love you…

There were times when it felt like ‘I love you’ was a tumour in the throat, words coughed out like a choke turned tight on a wrench. For long months I kept the words pressed in at the tail of … Continue reading

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you in me…

Dad, You live in me. I often forget that when I am missing the call that never comes, the conversation we can’t continue. I think of death as a blunt edge, the sudden stop when everything ends, the plunge into … Continue reading

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grief and zombies…

Heya Bab, I have a confession to make. Tonight I sat up watching some scary ass zombie movie that you-know-who had saved on my computer, even though it scared the crap out of me! I ate way too many Pringles … Continue reading

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whilst we’re here…

Today I hounded my mum and my brother out of the house and down to the beach. It might just have been easier to herd cats over an obstacle course. All morning it seemed things were in the way. It … Continue reading

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teddy bears and machetes…

Dad was a man of endless contradictions. He had boundless compassion and sensitivity, coupled with a short fuse and occaisonal beserker inclinations. We called it the ‘red rage’, the temper that fell like a thick impenetrable cloud. ┬áMany crazy family … Continue reading

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on becoming a ghost

My dad’s fight with cancer began nearly 4 years ago. For me, my first experience of the illness that eventually devoured him, was a casual phone call where he chatted through the strain I could hear in his voice and … Continue reading

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