the hole in my net…

Lately I am star-crossed with constellations of bites, little galaxies blazing on my skin. I ponder them, try to divine the beast that bit by the breadth of swell and ache of itch. But all too often they remain mysteries, a code I can’t decipher.

I am marked and I don’t know why. My peace has been stolen. I have no rest.

To me they are unknown and yet they know me, treat me like an angry passion, a bad-love pursuit. And there is a hole in my net.

I have tried reason, diplomacy, negotiations softened by the sombre falls of mesh and shades of dawn and dusk.

I have offered myself.I have empathised, sympathised, tugged myself out of me to feel for them.

I know they have their reasons, hungers, thirsts but there is only so much I should have to forgive and I am tired of having all the hurt.

So now I stalk them, act meek, feign fuzzy. Then sleep-heavy and bleary-eyed I corner them for the catch and crush. Change is a bright blood burst on my thumb.

I am not as nice as I look. I am allowed to be angry.

It is time to take some responsibility.

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5 Responses to the hole in my net…

  1. Kristie West says:

    I tell you who should be writing a book. YOU. A book or a book of poetry. You are one of the most stunning word artists I have ever read….and am I very fussy when it comes to who I read. I’d read a book you wrote, no matter what it was on, just because of the beauty of your words.

  2. jmgoyder says:

    I so agree with Kristie!

  3. Earle says:

    To mend your net, reach out to someone who needs your special gifts. To find yourself, you must first lose yourself in something or someone else in whom you believe. Thoughts and memories of your Dad will be with you forever, to comfort, warm and strengthen you, more cherished with the passing years. I am at the age that I have many absent friends and loved ones, and memories of them strengthen me.

  4. Thanks for the compliment – I am now at least grinning as I am itching!

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